"Listen to me," he started, "I know you're with her now, but I want you to know, I'm right here. You can avoid being complacent, you can work hard to please her and make her happy, but I want you know know, when you screw up, and you will screw up, I'll be right there to turn your mistake around. I'll be the one to catch her when she falls, I'll be the one to fix what you break, I'll be the one who'll..." he paused.
"The one who'll put Humpty Dumpty back together again when I inadvertently push her off the wall?" the second man finished.
The first man looked at him quizzically. "Yeahhh," he finally said, slowly, "Yeah, I'll be the one who'll put Humpty Dumpty back together again."
"Because she's meant to end up with you, not some schmuck like me who can't possibly appreciate what I've got?" The second man continued.
"You think this is funny? You think I'm joking?" the first replied back.
"Certainly not. I have no doubt, despite not knowing you, that you're completely sincere and have every intention of waiting for me to mess up so you can leverage that into an opening where you can prove to my girlfriend that you're better for her than I am. However, you're making one big mistake." A slow grin spread over the second man's face.
"Oh yeah, what's that?" the first replied, the last shreds of his defiance slowly evaporating.
"You're assuming I was never in your position. You know what happens when you assume, don't you?"
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